My
views on the Death Penalty:
Essay
by Saffiya S. Musaaleh
I
have been a Death Row 'wife' for the past seven years. Though many
believe that the Death Penalty affects only the man or woman sentenced
to die in the most egregious of ways,
it certainly affects the wife or husband, and other family members left
at home. As a (soon to be former) Death Row 'wife', I am fortunate; due
to the Supreme Court’s ruling, my husband, Nabiyl Musaaleh, will be
removed from DR in a short time. I have prayed for this day, always
believing my husband's life had a purpose.
I never thought about the Death Penalty in any aspect before 1996; I
had lived a full life, served in the military, attended college, and
enjoyed family and friends. In 1997 or there so, my brother gave me a
book written by Death Row inmate Mumia Abu-Jamal. Its title, Live from
Death Row. I read it from cover to end, intrigued, questioning the
saneness of a system that sought to imprison unlawfully. Abu-Jamal's
predicament spoke to me in that I had served this country and
experienced a control that sought to undermine me, to take away my
freedom. I learned to fight against that system, much like Abu-Jamal
did through his powerful essays.
In 1998, I was online seeking to write a pen pal, possibly from another
country and by chance, I came across an ad that was my Nabiyl's. It was
a page from the PrisonPenPals.com site, and I read it and tried to make
out the picture that was his. I couldn't tell what my husband looked
like; the picture was to dark to discern his features. I
just knew that he was someone I had to meet. I did not hesitate to
write him. Within a few weeks, I had a reply. From that point on, we
wrote, sharing ideas, beliefs, and goals for the future. A future that
might find me without him as a friend.
It is a common fact that when we love someone on the inside, we don't
look at what they have done in the past, better yet, what they may have
done to arrive at their station in life does not faze us because we see
into their hearts. We see the changes they have made to better
themselves. On Death Row, this is the only thing a man can do, for
solitude envelopes him, and allows him reflection.
Another common thing, for one on Death Row, is they lose contact with
the outside world. Family drops away, either from distance and dealing
with their daily lives, or because separation is better, disassociation
helps to mend fences with a society that decided the sentenced man or
woman was better off condemned. This separation is so final, and it is
the harshest aspect of confinement on the Row. It leaves one there
feeling desolate, without hope, knowing loneliness.
In the case of my husband, he was sentenced to Death Row at the age of
17; this was 1990. I worked as an educator at the time I met my husband,
and understood that a juvenile acts and processes life differently than
an adult. To quit things undertaken, to believe in immortality, to see
only as far as the night's outcome, is their capacity. My husband was
such a youth, his ideals at the time shaped by the streets that claimed
him. His path a product of a home life that did not allow him a
blueprint for success as my own had. Knowing this helped me form my
opinion about Death Row/the Death Penalty. I believed in my heart that
my husband deserved another chance; that the state of Florida needed to
look at his case again, and grant him life, if nothing more. Every
letter to my husband promoted these thoughts, and when I began to visit
him, the moments before leaving were tear-filled because of this
resolve. Eventually, I learned to be strong and the tears stopped,
prayers took over, and I waited.
While I waited, I researched, looked at law, read and prayed he would
be spared his life. I grew closer to his family, and by doing so opened
an avenue that allowed some healing between them, that closed a rift to
the greater extent. My husband will attest to this, and though he feels
there are patterns to the life his family lives that he cannot alter,
he knows he wants to help them see a future different than what might
be if he should ever get out.
And what is my opinion on the Death Penalty is the question at hand. In
March 2003, I believe, my husband and I did separate interviews with a
German Television station. A question was asked of me regarding how I
felt about the Death Penalty in regards to juveniles.
My answer (then and currently): To say a young man or lady is not
worthy of rehabilitation is wrong. They can change; can become
productive members of society if given the chance. We build more
prisons with the goal of locking up anyone who is incorrigible in lieu
of society's standards. We fail to build and revamp schools. The
problem is that education is devalued and killing is lauded where our
young people are concerned. Yes, they have done wrong, taken a life,
harmed someone, taken a family's loved one away, however, what are the
factors that put them there? What hand does society play when we look
at government spending, at the lack of available social service
programs for the mother struggling to raise a family of too many
children and few employment opportunities? Blame it on the country, the
state, and the county? Not fully, but collectively will suffice. Each
has played a hand in the demise of our youth one way or the other. Each
is culpable for failing to implement a safety net that would have
quelled loss on all sides, I believe.
There is a memory I hold in my heart where my husband's time on Death
Row is concerned. He and I are soulmates, hearts that came together
when time allowed our union. My husband and I were working on a project
together. I had stopped writing for a week, to reassess the writing
process. Sitting in my living room, I experienced a sadness, an
overwhelming feeling that he was experiencing loss. I could only ride
the feeling out, could only pray that he would feel better. On a visit
thereafter, I learned that a good friend of his had been executed,
dragged away to a finality that would separate him from the life
granted him. From friends, such as my husband, that had helped him know
compassion where before it was absent.
I held him, and in my heart prayed that I would not know that loss.
The Death Penalty allows any state that fosters it, a killing field,
and a license to be God. It is finality, and by all means necessary
should be quelled.
We have seen innocent men freed from the row, have read about botched
executions that registered the inhumanity of this system.
The Death Penalty is truly an end to life's possibility.
The possibility of change to one condemned before.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, and my prayers are with
everyone who has to live with the knowledge their loved one might be
put to death.
Sincerely,